How does life appear from a bed for someone who is staring at Heaven’s door in front of him and looking back at life slipping out? What would he be thinking as his life hangs on the life support system and his family grapples with a decision that I wish no one ever has to make? He is my friend of years and I see him slipping out of my reach. I feel very sad today, mixed up in emotions that are difficult to share. However, what matters most is what he would want me to think today? Somehow I know the answer, thus this mail is to share the story of my friend, while he battles for his life in a hospital in California.
This story started 23 years ago, in 1986, when at HCL we decided to be the first to introduce UNIX in India. I walked into the R&D center in Chennai (Madras then) to meet the man who was leading the development initiative – his name was M. N. Divakar (MND to his friends). If my memory serves me right, I walked up three floors and knocked on his room with anticipation. It was a small no nonsense room, with a whirlpool of energy and MND sitting right at the center. That is the way MND is – always in the center of action.
Many long strategy sessions later, we became friends and spent significant time on Marina Beach after office, talking about our passion and life in general. I came to know the real person behind the super intellect. He was a man with a mission and wanted to move ahead in the technology race and truly believed that everything was “possible”. That made him the center piece with HCL gaining No. 1 position in Indian IT landscape led by the UNIX products he rolled out. That was the golden period for HCL and he was leading it from the front. He navigated his team through complex technologies and market challenges with his approach and he won.
Life took us in different directions – he went to the U.S. to head a business and I got busy doing other things. A few years later, I heard of his first brush with cancer. I met him during those days. He had not lost his spirit, nor his focus on work and was 100 percent sure that he will beat cancer. He systematically and clinically went after cancer and won the battle just because of his positive attitude.
Our journey connected us again in 2005, when I had the first long chat with him after many years and I saw the same hunger in his eyes. He told me “give me something very difficult to do, I want a new challenge”. I saw that he had not changed one bit and was ready to chase the impossible dream. We started the journey of transformation within HCL. Once again, he was core of the think tank and the biggest champion of change, as my friend, philosopher and guide.
It was too good to last. Summer of last year the cancer reappeared, bigger and meaner this time. He called me and shared the start of a new battle in his life. I asked him how he wants to deal with it because doctors were throwing not-so-good statistics. He said he wants more challenges. Forty eight hours later, we had a conference call with all leaders at HCL to share that MND has decided to pursue two battles – one for his life and one to transform a part of our business that needed significant change. He was excited, charged and full of hope that he will beat it again.
The cancer treatment was tough and unpredictable. However, MND had made up his mind that he will fight it and not stop working. So he would be on conference calls while in the hospital, he would send mails while the blood transfusion was going on. He was completely in charge and in control, irrespective of how bad he felt. He was focused on his promise to transform the business he was leading. He would attend conference calls with me at odd hours even if he had no energy to speak. He would only listen and you would see a clear mail from him after few hours on what he will do. Any suggestions that he takes it easy were met with “Don’t be ridiculous”.
We stopped talking about cancer, other than his emails that gave me status updates where he would celebrate small victories and talk about resolving to fight the setbacks.
January 15 was one such day and he wrote “the results of the first scan after two months of radiation looked positive with substantial improvement in the tumor. This is a significant milestone in the treatment plan.”
We both thought that he had won it again and planned his trip to India to start a new challenge and to celebrate his 30 years in HCL. I guess that was not meant to be, as his situation deteriorated with each passing day and at a speed which no one anticipated.
Today, he is in the hospital on life support, knocking on Heaven’s door. I think he has won again. He has taught me and many others, the art of fighting impossible battles and winning. Everything is really possible and he is right. These may be the last few days he spends with us and I want to take this opportunity to spread his message to as many people, as I can as I see his victory in that message. Let’s learn from him and pray that God gives us more spirited people like MND who have shown the world a new dimension to life and how to live it. It is not important whether you live it or die; it is how you live which really counts.
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Dear Sir,
Really moved by truely inspired real life of a dedicated proffessional and a human being who has always taken every single second of his life a new challenge. I think life is not a challenge for M. N. Divakar but he is a bigger challenge to life. He had lived up to this challenge in the past and I am very sure that he will again do it.
A Person is always remebered by his Character, Attitude, Leadership Ability to lead from front and above all how he transforms life’s of others….
what I have understood from your inpired message is that one cannot reduce risks in his life to zero level but yes one can optimise his/her resources and with the help of this optimisation we can reduce these risks…
I think he is an inspiration to all the people and to a person like me who is just at the forefront of his carrer…
My prayers for MND & thanks to Vineet to share your life journey with us.
Cheers
Nantha.K
Well it is a sad day; my condolences to MND’s family and to HCL for losing a veteran who was dynamic and was willing solicit ideas and new talent. He was one of those bosses that I held at high esteem and attributed my professional success to his mentorship. Today I feel bad referring to him in past tense.
We indeed fought many battles with the customer but we always came successful because of MND’s presence of mind and strategy. My association with him deepened with the maturing ODC for a semi conductor client and every meeting of mine with him was learning to me. When I was leaving HCL he did ask for a first right of refusal and such a statement from a person like MND elated me and I can never forget that day. MND’s thoughts will always be with me as I progress through my professional career; may his soul rest in peace.
Almighty, please assist MND in his final journey and make this transition peaceful and pain free. Amen.
I am at the brink of commencing my career with HCL Technologies..thanks for sharing story of an unsung hero like MND…
You as a person has always been a source of inspiration for taking the organization through this transformational journey but like you ,now he will also serve as a motivating force for all of us
May he experience peace in whatever future holds for him
Truly inspiring real life ! May god bless MND.
Hey Vineet,
You are lucky to have experience the relationship with someone like MND… its a way of existance to spread the message via different mediums… i’m sure each one of us (MND, you and all the readers of this post) learnt some varied lessons out of it… thanks for sharing your heart out… thats the only way you can live many experiences via everybody…
god bless
AJ
Dear Vineet, From the mundane world of business,economics,and technology- your message comes out as really refreshing and Inspiring. It really speaks about the invincible human spirit.
My prayers for MND.
Keep writing, keep sharing,Keep inspiring.
regards
Dear Vineet,
Tracking your passion and compassion has become a habit of choice.
The mantra here is to keep faith, which, knowing you, would never fade.
As an aside, expression through the soul, transcends leadership and management jargon..and that you do well
regards
kamal
Greetings Sir,
You were always touching and inspirational in every aspect you think and walk through.
I am strong now and have full belief that we are the best on the world, and I say aloud to this universe that I am an HCL – ite and I have wonderful and charismatic leaders to follow.
But the Blog is very touching and warmth of your relationship towards Mr.MND is shown out as well his committment and passion towards the Business Goal is enormous and strong.
I am very proud of you as well as Mr.MND Sir.
I was shocked to see an obituary yesterday in a Bangalore newspaper announcing the sad demise of MND.
In 2003, MND, and a couple of senior managers, interviewed me, following which I joined the semiconductor practice (of which MND was senior VP) of HCL in Chennai. I was impressed by the professionalism and integrity (which I had not seen at another Indian ITES company) of the team there, and worked with some wonderful colleagues, and customers. MND was a "gung-ho" person. While I am no longer at HCL, I can imagine that MND will be missed at HCL and the industry.
Thank you, Vineet, for writing this blog to share a glimpse of MND’s life with us.
MND’s choosing "very-difficult" assignments is most inspiring.
I pray for peace to the departed soul, and strength to the bereaved family.
peace and prayers for MND and I am sure he would shine as well from his new home and would carve a niche there too
My heartfelt condolences to MND’s family and the HCL-ites. MND has been a great man of inspiration. His encouraging words still reverberates in my ears.
We all will miss him.
Hi Vineet,
I may be sounding a Bit Philosphical but Life is Quite Unpredictable…MND started a New Journey and so will we one day, leaving behind everyone & everything – There were so many people who became Famous & Celebrities but where are they?? Nobody knows them – So is Life all about only Achieving Targets or what we call Bottomline or is it something else…May be Life’s Meaning is directly proportional to the Comfort we give to others….I am still aearching…An Ex HCLite
My Prayers & Dua for MND…
Dear Vineet,
Your friend MND is indeed a real life hero. As you mentioned , everyone lives and dies. But what matters is how you have lived your life. MND had inside him what we call is HUMAN SPIRIT and that is what is the greatest gift of god to man.
from the age of 15 till 30 i searched for god , his existence and many questions?
Coping with my moms illness(heart attack, kidney failiure, dialysis etc) , I finally fro past 6 years I finally realized that GOD is within me and that is the human spirit/ How I make use of it is upto my emotional intelligence.
Your friend MND was a brave soul, who despite having such traumatic circumstances embraced humn spirit which definetly would have led him to heavens door.
God bless MND and his spirit
Rishi Sharma
Vineet, as I read your post and then the comments below it, my heart sank. Being in the marketing team, we were constantly in touch with the business heads and MND’s opinions were always respected and well thought through. I feel the same shock today that I felt a couple of years back when Som (someone who we all respected and looked forward to working with) passed away. My condolences to the family and to the team.